Valentine’s Day February 14, 2010
Posted by admin in : Relationships, Spiritual Growth , 1 comment so far
Hearing the word “Valentine” use to send chills down my spine. All the fascination around a holiday of love use to leave me feeling weary and disappointed from all the miserable years I spent alone. Love and flowers and chocolate and an upsurge of romance on television and stores left me jaded and bitter and hating Cupid and his stupid holiday. All I ever wanted was to love and be loved yet there I was single while the rest of the world was submersed in public displays of affection.
This want and need for some display of affection was simply a result of me not feeling loved as a child. I spent years of wasted time and energy trying to get people to love me. I struggled because it seemed the more I wanted it, the more unavailable it became. I did everything right. I became an obsessive compulsive perfectionist all to get someone…anyone’s approval. It was a desperate attempt that left me feeling even more abandoned and emotionally exhausted.
It wasn’t until I had no energy left to be perfect anymore that I was finally able to let go. I finally got to a point where I didn’t care what anymore else thought of me or whether or not they approved. I was tired of beating myself up for nothing. I had become my own worst enemy; criticizing and judging myself for everything. Being hard on myself for not living up to my own expectation of having to be this perfect person.
I couldn’t keep punishing and blaming myself for every little fault and the irony was that when I finally let go and surrendered and started the journey inward, people started showing affection and love towards me and it all seemed foreign. I didn’t know what to do with it because by that point I had already given up and no longer needed it because I was learning to love myself.
The more I got in touch with my higher self and started to live my life more consciously, the more alive I became and the more love I felt from the world around me. That’s the thing. You have to reconnect to your center and love yourself before anyone else can truly love you and if you sit around waiting for someone to come save you, you’ll be waiting a really long time. You have to save yourself and then the world becomes an ocean of love and light in a way you never dreamed possible.
So I say to you on this most beautiful delicious day of love…”Love yourself and don’t sit around sulking and feeling sorry for yourself. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, let go of any expectations. This is just a day of love to love and be loved so start by loving yourself. Do something special for yourself whether that means going shopping and buying yourself something special or taking yourself to get a massage or cooking yourself a nice meal or taking a walk out in nature. The world is your oyster!”
Hiding Behind the Mask of Addiction February 6, 2010
Posted by admin in : People, Spiritual Growth Tags:addictions, bad habits, emotional baggage, Spiritual Growth, vulnerability , add a commentAs a culture, we hide from ourselves in an attempt to mask the deeper truths that exist within us. There are old wounds, trauma, heartache, loss, and other forms of suffering trapped in the body. The brain, central nervous system, and other parts of the body are effected by our senses and by our emotions and thoughts. Judgments and criticism have reined the human psyche for years. The need for validation and approval have left us insecure and weak. The loss of control as a society and as individuals have left us scared and vulnerable. The evolution of technology and luxury of electronics have created a society where communication has become superficial. We have become sheltered and exposed to the kind of suffering that makes us shrink in the face of our corrupt government and the destruction of our divine mother.
It’s no wonder we tune out and detach from ourselves and the intimacy of another. We find one distraction after another to conceal the damaging affects life has had on us and yet we don’t even realize it. We’re all addicted to something that shelters us from seeing the truth and if we don’t do something about it, we’re going to be destroyed and there will be no one to blame, but ourselves.
We have to remove the barriers and stop self-medicating. We need to get out of our head and stop listening to the stories we tell ourselves. We must get quiet and listen for the only way we are going to hear the truth is to be still and uninhibited by the false sense of self . This takes dedication and perseverance and isn’t always easy, but if we want to evolve and clear the baggage out of our life, we must do some personal work. It’s no wonder we’re not at peace. We need to stop hiding behind our addictions and technology and be more willing to be vulnerable and open and willing to let go of the past.
Remove a bad habit out of your life for a month and see what comes up for you. Whether it be turning off the television for a month or not drinking or eating sweets, make a commitment and stand by your promise. Stuff will come up and the ego will try and pull the mask back on. You might find yourself irritated or sad or relentless in your pursuit to defy the “stupid” idea of letting go of something that has been so satisfying and rewarding for so many years, but don’t judge it. Simply stay with it and observe and see what happens. You will get a lot of clarity and insight about yourself in a way you never dreamed possible.
All the answers are within us and there is peace and love and a lot of light in our heart, but we have to be willing to reconnect to our center by clearing out the congested energy and come out from hiding behind the comforts we’ve put in to place in attempt to protect ourselves from being hurt. Take off the mask, open your heart, and dive in. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, give yourself permission to be emotional, and embrace the freedom that comes from such inquiry and self-exploration.
Be Your Own Teacher November 11, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth , add a commentWhy isn’t there more peace in the world and for that matter, why isn’t there more peace in each and every one of our hearts? I think it’s because we are afraid…afraid of not being good enough…afraid of failure. Of course we don’t want to live in fear so we reflect our pain on to others by blaming and judging. We throw ourselves in to our work and relationships and get caught up in other people’s drama. We overeat, drink, or find some other addiction to satisfy our inadequacies. We sit mindlessly in front of the tv or the computer and it’s only taking us farther and farther away from ourselves.
A couple days ago I walked in to a bookstore and as I looked around, I couldn’t help, but notice all the books on Religion, Diet, Self-help, and Fiction. Where were all the books on Science, Spirituality, and other practical applications? Of course they were there, but not to the same degree. I got to thinking how this ironically shows up everywhere in our life. Think about all the reality-based television shows people obsess about or all the people that fill their time with everything and anything just to avoid spending time in their own skin. Why are we running from ourselves? Are we just scared of what we will see if we take a really good long hard look at ourselves and is this because of what media and social and cultural programming has done to our culture?
Why should we just take the word of another mortal instead of listening to our own authentic selves? We put more trust in the media, medical professionals, and our peers than our own truth. We have lost touch with what’s really important in life and we’re being led through life like puppets and doing nothing about it. As a culture, we are constantly releasing negative energy and continue to contribute as taker instead of seekers. We can’t continue down this path for very much longer, as people need to start taking accountability for their own lives and awaken to something greater. We need to start trusting ourselves and listening to our inner teacher. We’ve all had our fair share of turmoil and there is a lot of suffering in the world, but that can’t stop us from honoring our inner most being and listening to our higher selves and moving through life more consciously. Ignorance is not bliss. It’s just an excuse not to learn or grow spiritually.
The mind and body are so powerful that all we have to do is want change…want growth…want to let go of baggage and old programming. Put it out there and let your intention start as a seed and then cultivate it through some kind of spiritual practice and watch how fast and abundantly your flower grows and once it starts to sprout, there’s no turning back. You will be engulfed in more joy than you ever dreamed possible.
Rebirth November 5, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth Tags:awareness, dreams, freedom, letting go, marriage, trust , add a commentPeople often ask me if I’m ”always” happy and I can’t help, but laugh because I’m the most sensitive person on the planet. Just because I have a positive outlook on life and live everyday to it’s fullest, doesn’t mean I don’t go through rough periods or experience sadness or even bouts of depression. None of us are spared from the shadow. We just handle it differently and I, personally, choose to deal with it head on because I know that being sensitive and allowing myself to feel every passing emotion creates beautiful space and a shift in consciousness that brings about profound awareness and mental clarity. My journey is about exploring the inner truth that seeks to be sought, as I want to grow and learn as much as I can.
The problem is that sometimes we don’t want to see the truth because often times it can be painful. For me most recently, it was realizing my dream to be married and have children might not ever happen. After finding myself in another relationship with someone who didn’t believe in the constitution of marriage, I knew it was time to face the fact that my journey might be something other than I had hoped. I just couldn’t continue thinking about it and dreaming about it while knowing I was in a relationship with someone who dreamed otherwise. The alternative was to leave a man I loved, but my feelings were too strong so I had to let go.
Letting it go didn’t happen overnight, as it took me revisiting it and going over it in my mind again and again. What made it so difficult was the ego telling me I didn’t deserve to be married or have a child, that I was being punished for something, which is just old programming and conditioning from the past. Our spirits know better because when it comes right down to it, we are all worthy of the absolute very best and if I were truly meant to get married or have a child, it would happen whether I obsessed about it or not so why not just let it go and be free?
Even though I finally found the emotional strength and confidence in myself to let it go, it wasn’t easy. When a person holds on to a dream for so long, it becomes a part of the body’s physiology and letting go of old patterns can illicit strong emotions so I went through a bout of depression. My spirit felt lost and my hope smothered by despair, but I knew that a huge spiritual transformation was about to occur so I had to allow myself to feel the sadness because the only way for a person to know light is to know dark.
In order to shine out from within, you have to be willing to sit in the shadow and endure a little suffering or heartache in order to really awaken and open your eyes to a higher truth. The more in touch you can get with your pain, the more in touch you will be with life, but that means getting to know it, being one with it, feeling it on every level. Once feelings surface, they can be released and what remains is a new sense of direction and a greater understanding of self and how it relates to the world.
Life is about living and dying, as one cannot be with the other just like the sun cannot be without the moon or the day without night. When something begins to shift energetically, you have to be patient because in order for transformation to occur, you have to be willing to let go of old thought patterns…old ideas…old social and cultural programming. This can feel like death in a way, but once the dark shadow clears, an absolutely radiant light fills the soul and you feel a sense of freedom you’ve never felt before.
I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow or the next day. I just know right here right now and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and the freest I’ve ever felt. I’m creating my own destiny now…what I want…what I need…what I deserve and it feels so good not to be trapped behind a fairytale anymore. I wish more people were committed to the journey because the shift in global consciousness would be a collective uprising of positive energy that would have such a huge impact on the world.
People just need to stop following the minds of others and have more confidence in themselves, as people tend to beat to the sound of our culture’s drum just going with the flow like puppets being pulled by the strings of politics and media. I realize it’s much easier to follow traditions and societal riches than to do the work necessary to grow spiritually, but we’re never going to evolve as a culture if we remain stuck in the old way of doing things.
Finding Clarity July 25, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth , add a commentIn order for abundance to flow, the body must be a clear, open, and receptive channel. Just as large boulders or rocks change the course of water flowing downstream, physical, emotional and mental barriers can alter the flow of energy in the human body.
Ever since I began the journey of self-discovery, I seemed to put most of my energy towards emotional and mental well being…cleaning out emotional clutter…letting go of old karmic patterns…dealing with childhood issues…you name it. As I peeled away layers of the onion, I received new insights, a more keen sense of awareness, and I got more in touch with my true essential nature. When I let go of the dark shadows, I began to shift in to a more peaceful state…feeling radiant and full of life. There was a sense of joy that filled my entire being and love emanated out from the core. I found more compassion and forgiveness for myself and others and I wasn’t so quick to judge.
The journey also brought a sense of mental clarity, as I began to work on mindfulness and things that once irritated me or left me feeling short and impatient, no longer affected me. I was able to tolerate a lot more ignorance and had a better understanding of how life worked and why people behaved in the manner they did. The world opened up to me and I became more in tune with the flow of life instead of paddling up stream.
The only problem was my ego was threatened by the spiritual growth so it tried to protect itself by rooting itself in human suffering, as the ego has a magical way of finding weakness to bring a spirit down and it’s typically through some kind of addiction since everyone has one. The spirit gets clouded under the vice of bad habits and suddenly the mind and emotions take over and you find yourself lost all over again. Instead of positive energy flowing through you, a dark cloud forms overhead and you’re unable to see the light because the physical body becomes blocked and it takes an extreme amount of will to see past it.
It’s easy to get stuck…to fall prey to old patterns…to lose your sense of self. It happens to all of us. One day we feel joy and the next despair. Often you don’t even know when it’s happening. You just wake up one day and realize you’re not totally happy with either your job or your relationship or life in general. I always know when it’s time for a little spring cleaning because my mind gets cloudy and I can’t see clearly.
The best way to get clarity on something is to detoxify the body of impurities and get rid of the noise in your life. This may mean taking a reprieve from the television or internet, not drinking alcohol, meditating, doing more yoga, setting yourself free from the daily ritual of caffeine, or taking a break from whatever other bad habits that might keep you from being centered and whole.
This is by no means easy, but a little spiritual nurturing will get you back in touch with what really matters. You will regain control of your life. You will feel centered and alive and whole again. The energy will begin to flow and your life will blossom, as you realign yourself with what really matters. As you feel more balanced, you will gain mental clarity and will be able to hear the soft whispers of your loving higher self.
Sweat Lodge Ceremony July 1, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth Tags:expectations, Intentions, judgments, Native American, purification, Summer Solstice, Sweat Lodge , 1 comment so farI attended my 3rd sweat lodge purification ceremony on the Saturday before Summer Solstice. I felt the turn of the season was a good time to do it, as sweats are a traditional Native American ceremony designed to purify the mind, body, and spirit. They help bring you to a place of balance within yourself and are a great way to find communion with Mother Nature.
One of the purposes of attending a sweat is for spiritual and emotional healing and growth so typically a person will fast for 24 hours preceding the sweat as a means to prepare the body for purification. While you physically prepare the body, you also prepare the mental and spiritual bodies by praying and setting intentions, as lodges are a healthy way to release baggage and a safe haven to seek guidance from spirit.
Rituals and traditions vary so each ceremony is a little different depending upon who leads it. The first two experiences were with the same guy so I was a bit disappointed when I found out he wasn’t running the 3rd, but trusted everything was in divine order and knew either way I would get whatever I needed. Out of curiosity, I asked him why he wasn’t leading and he told me his energy was wrapped up in something else and he didn’t want to perform the ritual unless he was fully present and committed to the journey of everyone involved so he entrusted the ceremony to a respected friend.
Another thing I didn’t expect were children to participate and although it was beautiful to expose little beings to something so spiritually enriching, their energy was very distracting because they couldn’t take the heat or smoke. They were in and out quite a bit and I could hear them moving about every time they stepped out for some fresh air. There were also quite a few people who were new so the heat was a little much for them. In honor of the children and those who were sweating for the first time, the lodge leader decided to leave the flap open for the last two rounds.
The reason the lodge was kept dark was because it represented the womb. The darkness was a symbol of human ignorance before the great awakening of spirit. It created a safe place for people to voice their prayers as the dark put aside all physical, spiritual and cultural differences. Since it wasn’t dark inside, I didn’t feel completely safe to recite my prayers and I found myself silently judging the distractions from the children and for the differences in how the ceremony was being run. I didn’t like the thoughts that were sub-consciously surfacing or how insensitive I was being towards the people I was supposed to love. What happened to the “one” mentality and who was I to judge and where was my compassion?
I sat with this for a couple days and finally realized spirit was just answering my prayers. Sweat lodges are known for bringing issues to light and one of my intentions for that evening was to release myself from the steady stream of unyielding judgments that ran through my sub-conscious. All the irritations I was feeling had deep meaning, as they made me realize what I still needed to work on. The spiritual journey isn’t always as we expect so it’s important to be open because you never know when someone or something is going to cross your path for the purposes of awakening your consciousness.
Taking the “Red” Pill June 15, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth Tags:awareness, commitment, ego, Ignorance, Life lessons, pure consciousness, Spiritual Growth, Spiritual work , 1 comment so farMaking a commitment to walk the spiritual path and be devoted to your higher self is like taking the red pill in the movie Matrix. Once you take it, there’s no going back. You can no longer claim blissful ignorance once you’ve been freed from the delusional reality you were once living. You have to be steadfast in your pursuit for happiness because you are no longer in the dark and have to be responsible and accountable for your actions. This often means being knee-deep in spiritual work, as you peel away layers of the proverbial onion and it’s not always pleasant and sometimes it’s downright painful, but it’s invaluable and feeds you in a way money can’t.
Spiritual work brings light and love and states of bliss that fill your entire being with such presence and divine awareness. The more work you do, the more you experience states of pure consciousness where life makes sense and you are right with the world. Being committed to a spiritual journey brings awareness and sense of self that fills your life with such peace and balance, as you are freed from the ego and the doom and gloom of being a mortal in this unjust world. Everyone has access to this joy, but unfortunately, many people are content with the blue pill because ignorance is bliss. Some just don’t care to do the work and I don’t blame them because there are definitely days I wish I could go back.
The kind of joy you get from doing spiritual work doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a daily practice and takes perseverance, as some days are easier than others and you never quite know when life is going to throw you a lemon. You just have to be able to take the lemon and make lemonade and appreciate the gifts however they come. We create our reality through our intentions and actions so if there is something we need to learn, we subconsciously put ourselves in situations that teach us about ourselves and the world in which we live.
Whether it is a friend, a family member, a random stranger, a partner, or a colleague, relationships are opportunities to learn things about ourselves and grow both personally and professionally. Once you understand this, you begin to cultivate the seed of awareness and a shift begins to happen. The lessons begin to exponentially multiple as your consciousness expands because your able to see the bigger picture.
The more your consciousness expands, the more your self defeating limited ego tries to regain power by telling you stories that make you feel insecure and weak because the ego wants to keep you in a state of ignorance. It becomes an internal conflict and struggle that can be overwhelming because on one hand, you know you’re growing and learning something beautiful, but on the other hand, your ego makes you feel worthless and doubt what you know to be true.
If you find yourself pointing fingers or placing blame on someone, take a step back and look within yourself to find the gift in the emotions you’re feeling because you’re just clearing stuff out and making space for more light to flow in your life. Relationships help you get rid of baggage that no longer serve you so don’t see arguments or challenging situations as a conflict. See them has opportunities to learn something new about yourself. Once you own your own stuff, clarity will follow and you will be one step closer to knowing your true essential nature.
The Ego is not Necessarily the Enemy February 23, 2009
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth Tags:awareness, balance, ego, extremes, sympathetic nervous system, Yoga , 3commentsThere are times when life seems to be perfectly aligned with your inner purpose and everything is completely effortless, but then out of the blue, you find yourself feeling lost and totally disconnected. I spent years staggering between extremes. I was either feeling good or bad…up or down…in one direction or the other. One moment I indulged in every desire and the next I sought out simplicity and purity. I felt bipolar, as there was a part of me that loved to be wild and crazy, but then there was another part of me that liked to be settled and virtuous.
Living from one extreme to the next left me exhausted and yearning for balance. Why couldn’t I find a happy medium where both the fun wild party girl and the meditating peaceful yoga girl could live in harmony without feeling like it had to be all or nothing. It took many years of living between the two worlds before I learned how to peacefully incorporate the two. My yoga practice and commitment to spiritual growth is what brought equanimity and ease in to my life.
In finding balance and keeping my body and mind connected, I’m now aware when my ego starts to take over and pull me in a different direction because I can see the shift happening, as I find myself skipping yoga practice, being more judgmental, making excuses as to why I can’t meditate, craving sweets and partying like a rock star. Things that don’t typically bother me start to get to me and I tend to react instead of handling conflicts more passively. A fire blazes through me, as my wild child unleashes and suddenly I become stubborn and liberated with no sense of grounding.
When these things start happening, it’s a clear indication I need to pull back the reins a bit and come back to a place of equanimity, but before I can do that, I have to look at my life and figure out what caused the shift. An imbalance usually means something isn’t working. There’s a relationship that has gone awry, a job that needs to end, or some other change that needs to happen. When something is out of sync, the sympathetic nervous system kicks in to fight or flight and I go in and hide, as the protective ego steps in to save me. I use to think the ego was bad because it took me away from my healthy yogic lifestyle, but now I see it as my body just trying to get my attention.
I don’t have to run anymore, as I now honor the presence of the ego as my protector. I witness the body shutting down. I see the signs. I’m aware of being ungrounded and not centered or aligned with my higher purpose and the moment I become aware is the moment I find my way back to the mat and to the daily morning ritual of sitting in meditation. It doesn’t take much for me to remember my true essential nature and be back in touch with my higher self. I don’t have to live in extremes anymore. I can live in a place of balance without having to swing between the bipolar worlds of self and ego.
If familiar negative habits and patterns start showing up in your life, then it’s a pretty good indication you need to get back on the mat or do something to nurture yourself. The longer you wait, the longer it will take for you to get back to a place of center. It’s truly about living life more consciously and being aware of your habits so you can see shifts happening before they overcome you. Once the pendulum swings back to neutral, the things in your life that caused you to sway from your path will magically fall by the wayside. Everything in life is interconnected so listen to your body and honor yourself. It is your inner experience of self that guides you…not your thoughts or emotions, but your true higher self. The only way you’ll know when it’s time to end a relationship or change jobs or make a positive change in your life is by quieting the mind and going within to the inner sanctuary of self, which is where the rest of the world seems to fall in to place.
Transforming sadness October 31, 2008
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth , add a commentWhat would our lives be like if we experienced extreme joy all the time? Would we get bored being happy all the time? Would life be nearly as exciting without all the lessons and challenges we face in our daily lives? No. Life was designed to take us to our limits and test us so we could experience life more fully.
I use to fight bad days like the plague because I hated being unhappy, but as I got older I realized bad days were actually gifts and were meant to be embraced and honored. I stopped trying to fight off my emotions and instead learned to acknowledge and make peace with them. Every day was a new day and I never knew what was going to come up over the horizon as the sun rose to meet the day. It is not about moving past your lower emotions…it is about transforming them in to higher more divine emotions like love and happiness.
The body has a way of shutting down around suppressed feelings until eventually the body expels them by way of disease or some other physical ailment. The only way you can truly transform your emotions is to honor them, which means feeling sad when you are sad and angry when you are angry. It’s important to create a space for sadness, anger, loneliness, and all the other emotions that surface during trying times. If not, you could very well end up letting your emotions take over.
I almost allowed this to happen one day last week, as I was having one of those days where life didn’t seem fair and the weight of the world was on my shoulders. I felt sad and my heart heavy. I kept hoping the rain would wash away the grief, but instead, it loomed over me like a dark cloud. I gave myself permission to spend the evening on the couch watching television, drinking wine, and eating comfort food. I allowed myself to cry and feel sad, but the next day was a new day and I wasn’t about to sit around feeling sorry for myself so I had a choice to either let my mind drive me absolutely crazy with negative thoughts or I could do something to transform my feelings into something more positive.
It wasn’t easy, as the mind is quite powerful, but I refused to lay on the couch another day so I made myself some hot tea and got in touch with what I was feeling. I realized it wasn’t just sadness…I was feeling alone and a little insecure, but I also knew I wasn’t trusting in the divine plan or in my higher soul. I knew I needed to put some action behind my intention to transform these lower emotions so I thought about what I could do to make me feel happy again.
My heart was telling me to go on a bike ride, but my bike was in storage and inaccessible. This left me feeling frustrated, as I knew getting out of the house and going for a ride would bring a lot of joy to me so I had to come up with a different plan. I tried borrowing my roommate’s bike, but that didn’t work out so I called a friend to see if I could borrow her bike. I didn’t hear back from her so I went on-line and looked up bike rentals and found a place at the base of the Silver Comet Trail where I could rent one.
It was exactly what I needed to get my power back!!! I rode hard for 14 miles and loved every minute. It was an absolutely beautiful fall day and the weather was perfect. The sun was beaming yet the air was brisk and invigorating. It felt refreshing to be outside and empowering to be on a bike racing down the trail with the wind by my side. Either side of the trail was adorned with wild natural growth of varying shades of green. The trees were ripe in fall colors and there were butterflies and insects fluttering across the fields. As I rode, the sadness dissipated, the loneliness turned in to connectedness, and the fear transformed in to trust. It was magical!!!
The Universe can’t give us what we want if we are stuck feeling sad or if we don’t put some trust in our higher power. We have to transform our energy and in return the Universe supports us with divine love and blessings. Don’t try and outrun your emotions…give yourself a day to sit and process them without feeling sorry yourself. Once you’ve made peace with them, transform them by doing something to create the opposite of what you were feeling. Try it and see what happens.
Manifest and Believe August 9, 2008
Posted by admin in : Spiritual Growth Tags:clarity, dreams, manifest, old patterns, starting a business, thought forms , add a commentI can’t even begin to explain how excited I am about starting my own business. I’ve dreamed about this day for as long as I can remember and now it’s here and it feels surreal. It’s absolutely mind-blowing! For years I sat by and watched people follow their dreams and be successful. They seemed to find the one thing they were good at or most passionate about and started a business doing the thing they loved. I was surrounded by creative geniuses and yet I was in corporate doing something I didn’t really enjoy.
I knew I wanted to have my own business more than anything in this world, but I wasn’t specialized in anything so I use to beat myself up for not being good at any one thing and I would constantly struggle trying to figure out what I could do, but it wasn’t meant to be “figured out.” It was there the whole time…trying to get the mind to understand it was only pushing it further away. It wasn’t until I let go of it and was in the middle of teacher training one day totally in the moment that it popped into my head. I remember the moment of clarity like it was yesterday. It was like a bolt of lightening hit me. I heard a little voice say, “Yoga…that’s it…yoga…that is what you are suppose to be doing.” How did I miss something so obvious? It made perfect sense.
I was blissed out for the next couple of days just thinking about how good it would feel to leave corporate and teach yoga, but then a voice in my head started telling me I was crazy for thinking I could teach yoga for a living…it would never work. I felt discouraged and stupid for thinking I could start my own business. There was a lot more going on than what was happening on the surface. The truth was I didn’t feel good enough…I didn’t think I deserved it. Something happened somewhere along in my life to make me think I wasn’t good enough.
Sometimes the thing that inhibits us from making our dreams come true doesn’t have anything to do with what’s going on in the moment at hand. It has everything to do with old programming and thought patterns from when we were younger. They become so imbedded in to our psyche that we aren’t even conscious of them anymore. They become a part of our identity, but not our pure conscious identity…the ego identity.
If you don’t feel good about yourself then something other than your loving spirit is speaking to you. The voices that make us feel bad about ourselves come from being emotionally hurt, but the moment you bring awareness to the old patterns holding you back, the old energy loses power and you to start to awaken in a way you never dreamed possible. Sometimes it’s not easy and you have to do a little work to figure out what’s going on, but the journey is well worth it.
I can’t tell you what path to take to find yourself because it is different for everyone, but what I can tell you is that all you need to do is set the intention to let go of anything that is no longer serving you or preventing you from achieving your highest spiritual good and you will be led accordingly. I promise! All you have to do to make your dream a reality is believe and I mean truly believe, but if you don’t think you deserve what you’re manifesting or you don’t think you’re good enough, you won’t be able to believe.
I’m here to say that you are good enough and you do deserve. I don’t care who you are or what you do. Everyone deserves their dreams to come true so follow the self-defeating voice…go in…meet the demon face-to-face and conquer the limiting thought patterns that have kept you at bay for so long. Come back knowing you deserve the absolute best and know that you are good enough…then sit back and watch the magic unfold. I’m telling you from experience…all you have to do is manifest and believe…truly believe…it will happen!