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Letting go of what no longer serves you July 22, 2008

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A New Earth

At what point do you just stop and say, “enough…I’m through…I’m done…this no longer servers me?” We spend so much of our time doing stuff or making decisions that aren’t good for us. Why do we do it? We know it’s bad…it feels bad yet we continuously put ourselves through the same hurt over and over again. Whether its eating food that’s not good for us or drinking too much alcohol or consuming drugs or staying in a relationship that no longer serves us.

I don’t have the answers, but everyday I’m learning more and more how to say, “no” to what no longer serves me and “yes” to what does. How do we know what serves us? I think if it feels good in your heart than it serves you, but if it doesn’t feel good than you have to know deep down that it isn’t good for you. The problem is when something feels good, but on a superficial level. To some people drinking is fun. You forget about stress and have a good time, but the stress is still there and you wake up feeling like crap and somehow the stress feels worse.

I spent many years not knowing my limit and would drink until I was wobbling around like Bambi. I would wake up feeling terrible…nauseous and hung-over, but it was fun at the time, right? I finally realized I didn’t want to be that person anymore. It wasn’t serving me…it wasn’t making me feel good so I made the conscious decision to change what I was doing. We all have the power within us to make the necessary changes to make us feel good inside, but that means making better decisions in our life.

I also think we do things that no longer serve us because it feels safe…its comfortable. One of the hardest things you can do is walk away from something or someone because you know somewhere deep within yourself it’s the right thing to do. It’s not what you “want” to do, but what’s “best” for you. I think it takes an incredible strength to honor yourself in that way and you have to know the Universe will support any decision you make that is for your higher good. It is so much easier to stay in a relationship than it is to walk away…to continue going out and getting annulated…to keep eating the crap that makes us gain weight and feel tired and sluggish.

Of course it’s easier…it feeds the ego and the ego is powerful…it can take complete control over you. I’ve seen it happen and it breaks my heart to know a person’s beauty…what they’re heart is capable of…to know their spirit…to know the love in their heart, but to see a completely different side…a side that is so blind to who they truly are. We’ve all had that “friend” who was in a bad relationship, but couldn’t walk away…you knew they were better than that…you knew they deserved better yet there they were going back for more…more pain…more struggle…more heartache. What is it in people that blind them from seeing the truth…from seeing who they are and what they deserve? It’s years of conditioning…it’s years of the egoic mind feeding off of so much negativity.

There comes a point in time in every one’s life where you have to make a decision. Are you going to continue down the same destructive path or are you going to make a decision to move in a different direction? You have to honor yourself…your spirit…if you are not happy you are the only person who can change it. Don’t sacrifice yourself because it’s easier to stay in a relationship…easier to drink that 10th cocktail…easier to eat the greasy burger. You are better than that and you deserve better…you deserve to be happy. Life is too short to make those kind of sacrifices.

Pay attention to the questions you hear yourself ask…questions like, “What am I doing? Why am I allowing this? I deserve better than this…how did I get here?” These are coming from your true essential nature…your spirit. Your ego is the one who comes in and tries to rationalize…convincing you to stay and continue down the path that doesn’t serve you. I wish I could describe the ego as beautifully as Eckhart Tolle in A New Earth. He is an absolutely amazing author…brilliant in his understanding of life.

He is someone who truly “gets it!” He knows the truth…he speaks the truth…he is the truth. It’s incredible how he’s able to explain the ego and the part it plays in our life. I think everyone in this world needs to read his book, but the reality is that everyone isn’t ready to read his book and so there are people who wouldn’t get what he’s trying to say even if they tried. I’m learning that people have to be ready to open their eyes to that kind of awareness and if they aren’t ready than you have to honor the place they are in and just keep being your own light. I wish I could give the gift of conscious awareness to everyone, but the hard cold truth is that I can’t.



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