Indecent Proposal November 11, 2008
Posted by admin in : People , trackbackLike many other Americans, I was herded through a gymnasium for almost 4 hours, as I stood in line with hundreds of other people to vote Halloween night. I tried reading, but after scanning the same page 7 times I realized I wasn’t going to overcome the racket of voices outnumbering the words on the page. I tried listening to my IPod, but heard more conversation than music so as the great adage goes, if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. The 4 hours didn’t turn out to be so bad after all. I actually met some really nice people and I was grateful for this one gentleman, in particular, who kept me entertained.
I appreciated the intellectual conversation because there were a lot of other conversations going on that seemed superficial or completely ignorant and juvenile. You just never know who you’re going to meet or what you’re going to learn at the polling station. By the end of the evening we had pretty much covered everything from travel to parenting to what we did for a living. We exchanged cards right before we parted, but I honestly didn’t think I would ever see or hear from him again. Well the next afternoon he sent me a text message. We exchanged several messages throughout the day and then unexpectedly, he asked me if I wanted to join him for lunch one day during the week.
A man usually doesn’t ask a girl out unless he is interested, but he had a girlfriend so I was a little confused, as I wouldn’t be okay with my boyfriend meeting some girl in line and then asking her out to lunch. I certainly didn’t want to have a meal with someone who was already dating someone so I told him I didn’t think it would be appropriate. His response was that he had an open relationship, whatever that meant, and he didn’t think of having lunch with me as anything other than two people getting together to know each other a little better. He wanted to see if there was enough energy between us to cultivate a friendship, as he thought maybe we could be friends and go riding together since we talked a lot about mountain biking.
I thought “friends” were typically introduced by other friends or through work or social engagements, but perhaps a part of getting older was being comfortable with meeting someone and being able to have lunch with them without it being sexual. What if there was a reason we were suppose to meet and I closed myself off to a good business contact or riding buddy. Who knew? The possibilities were endless and there was definitely good energy between us so I was willing to explore it. Besides, I wasn’t attracted to him. He was eight years older than me, a Republican, an executive, father of two, and dating a beautiful socialite. Nothing about him had ”me” written anywhere on it.
We ended up meeting for dinner and I enjoyed his company. I felt good about my decision to meet him, as he put me at ease talking about his girlfriend, his kids and his job. I felt silly for thinking he was interested in more than just a friendship and thought I had learned something new in life until he walked me to the car, grabbed me with both hands and kissed me rather abruptly. Now what was that all about and why did he do that? I did not appreciate it one bit, but it certainly confirmed what I expected from the very beginning. I just wish there didn’t always have to be an underlying motive. Why can’t people just lay their cards on the table and be honest? Is it really that difficult?
I’m learning more and more to trust in my own instincts and not always give people the benefit of the doubt. I want to believe everyone is good and has the best intentions, but that’s just not the way it is in the real world. Just because my heart is wide open doesn’t mean the same for everyone else. I’m starting to wonder if life would be easier if I were more insensitive or insincere in my thoughts and actions. Perhaps I need to be a little more guarded and protected or maybe I just need to use a little more discretion and be such an open book when I meet people …maybe this way I wouldn’t be so disappointed when people let me down or showed a different side to themselves.
Comments»
Note to self…OPEN relationship..then.invite you to dinner….then play it off like you’re the one who’s an idiot – EW!…oh B…I loves you! Where’s my taekwondo bad ass? Harness the power of your intuitive bad ass that don’t take no shite! I love her just as much as my soft delicate lotus flower B.
Exactly what Beverly said!!! Big kiss muffin.